1. What does the author do particularly well? Be specific.
The research shows that the author has done lots of research. The author has found many convincing facts to support the thesis.
2. Ask the author for one particular concern that s/he had about the draft. Examine that area and see if you can offer the author helpful suggestions
I agree with the author’s idea. There are some ESL problems.
3. Does the author clearly express his/her opinion of the topic in the thesis?
Yes, I think so.
4. Does the thesis follow the format we’ve been using (ALTHOUGH clause, argumentative claim, BECAUSE clause with 3 reasons of support). Is thesis bolded or underlined and in last sentence of intro paragraph?
Yes. The thesis is good and in the correct form.
5. How many words is the draft, not including References?
It has 1633 words.
6. On a scale of 1 to 10, how interesting did you find this paper to read? Be brutally honest!
I think this draft could be 7.5. I agree that forests are very important for us.
7. Where can the author more fully develop ideas, either by providing examples or explaining/clarifying concepts for the reader?
I think the paper is good and idea is well supported by facts.
8. What kinds of objections might someone who disagrees with the author’s point of view raise?
I don’t think there is any objection.
9. Has the author dealt with these objections? If not, suggest some good places to deal with them
10. Is the relationship between each paragraph and the thesis clear? If not, what suggestions do you have for the author to improve the connection?
Yes. I think it is clear.
11. Are there easy transitions from one paragraph to the next, or does the author jump from topic to topic
Yes, there are transitions.
12. Does the opening of the essay capture the reader’s attention? How so? If not, what suggestions can you make that might strengthen the opening? Does the essay have an informative yet interesting title?
Yes. The opening is informative but not very interesting.
13. Does the concluding paragraph serve to bring the discussion to an end that logically follows from the thesis and its direction? If your buddy’s conclusion just restates the thesis, call him/her on that, and help them come up with a better conclusion. Maybe give them tips from the Hacker handbook (section C).
Yes, the concluding paragraph brings the discussion to an end. However, he should condensate the whole idea into a conclusion.
14. Does the draft contain at least 10 sources (5 peer-reviewed/scholarly sources from EbscoHost or another database)?
Yes. The draft contains 9 sources. I believe at least 6 are peer-reviewed.
15. Does the author rely heavily on just 1 or 2 sources, or does the author equally use all of the sources to support the paper’s thesis.
16. Does the author use in-text citations after every quotation, statistic, paraphrase, idea and opinion borrowed from research? Are the in-text citations done in correct APA formatting?
Yes, but some citations are not in the right form.
17. Does the author have anything on the Reference list that is not used in the essay (she/he should not).
No. I don’t find citation that not is included in the reference list.
18. Does the author have more quotations/statistics/paraphrases/etc in his/her paper than personal opinion? Essay should read as an argument, not as a report
No. I think this essay is read as an argument.
19. Are they any quotations that are longer than 2 lines?
No, there are no quotations.
20. Are there any quotations that you think should instead be paraphrased? Remember that too many quotations lead to clunky and chunky essays.
No, there aren’t any.
21. Any quotations should be commented upon. They are there to support the author’s argument, not to make it. Does the author comment after every one? If not, help the author decide what the underlying reason behind putting the quote in the paper was.
There is no quotation.
Is there any other feedback you’d like to give your buddy?
Not much. The ideas are good and reasons are convincing.